Antony & Cleopatra
Speak.
Cleopatra, Rome is on the brink of an all-out
civil war.
CLEOPATRA
And why should that interrupt my bath?
ADVISOR #1
You command the greatest navy in the world, a
strategic prize if your name happens to be Brutus
or Antony. Whichever one of them gets control of
your navy will rule the empire.
CLEOPATRA
Well it sounds like they'll both be courting me
then doesn't it?
ADVISOR #1
Or trying to eliminate you. There are those that
say, with you out of the way, the Egyptian navy
will go to the highest bidder.
CLEOPATRA
You worry too much.
I have always known how to protect Egypt, my
people, and myself. I will keep the Romans at bay.
See that my chief admiral receives those orders.
Hm-m. Is it just me, Shiana or do crises only
happen when I'm naked?
Cleopatra, an urgent message from Rome.
CLEOPATRA
Hm-m.
My queen! Help her!
CLEOPATRA
Shiana.
SHIANA
My queen.
Shiana, take this to Xena.
SHIANA
I will my queen.
Are we really going to do this?
Yes we're really going to do this. I feel that I owe
it to Cleopatra.
GABRIELLE
I wish Eve could see this.
XENA
No she's better off in Alexandria with my mother.
GABRIELLE
Do you have a plan?
XENA
First we become Egypt, and then we take on Rome.
There's a rumor that Brutus is in Egypt.
ANTONY
I hope it's true Canidius. It'll save me the trouble
of having to find him.
ANTONY'S LIEUTENANT
If he gets control of Cleopatra's fleet, we may
not wanna find him.
ANTONY
There's no reason to believe that he is any closer
to that than we are.
Sir! Queen Cleopatra bids you welcome, and
has sent you a gift!
ANTONY
(to Antony's Lieutenant) Queen Cleopatra has
sent me a gift. (to Soldier) Bring it in.
SOLDIER
Sir, yes sir! Bring it in!
It's a carpet sir!
Dismissed.
"Will Rome enter Egypt?"
I am Cleopatra...queen of Egypt...slave of Rome
END OF TEASER
ACT ONE
Cat got your tongue?
Queen Cleopatra, your reputation for not wasting
time 'tis well deserved.
Egypt is yours Antony.
Won't you free me?
Is that what you want? Surely, this is about you
capturing me.
XENA
If that was the plan I would have dressed for
the occasion.
Ah-h.
Hm-m.
Hm-m. Now I am free. And you?
Let's just say your conquest is not yet complete.
Well, of course not. And who could expect the
great Antony to surrender easily. I simply thought
that you might be the type to enjoy surprises.
ANTONY
Your guessing serves you well Queen, but I came
here, to form an alliance with you, one based on
trust, and openness.
XENA
I think we got the openness covered. And as for
trust, well I really couldn't have come here in a
more vulnerable state now could I? So perhaps
you should trust me. Come to my palace. I think I
can find a bed for you.
I must speak with Cleopatra at once!
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Brutus, is she expecting you?
BRUTUS
No she's not but I fear for her safety.
What does Cleopatra have to be afraid of Brutus?
BRUTUS
(whispers) Gabrielle.
I'm alive. (to Shiana) I'll handle this.
You survived the crucifixion.
GABRIELLE
You should have been there.
BRUTUS
What are you doing here?
GABRIELLE
I'm paying a visit to an old friend.
BRUTUS
Where's Xena?
GABRIELLE
She's with Cleopatra.
BRUTUS
Well then I'll see them both.
GABRIELLE
It's not a good time Brutus. I'll relay your concerns
about her safety.
BRUTUS
I'd just as soon do that in person.
Come on then. I won't bite.
(to Antony) Ah-h, why don't you wait there while
I slip into something less comfortable?
SHIANA
(to Xena) Brutus is here to see Cleopatra.
Ah, great idea Shiana. I'm sure Rome would love a
tour of Egypt's palace.
Gabrielle, this is ridiculous.
I have information that could save Cleopatra's life.
I insist on seeing her!
GABRIELLE
You're in no position to make demands!
Ave Brutus. You know you're in a queen's bedchamber.
BRUTUS
I have come to warn Cleopatra there are people
plotting against her. Under no circumstances
should she trust either Antony or Octavius. They
both want her dead.
XENA
Octavius? Caesar's adopted son?
BRUTUS
He claims to be the rightful heir to Rome. He's
just a murdering opportunist.
XENA
Well, I'll be sure and tell her. I know she'll appreciate
your concern.
BRUTUS
I would like to see her myself.
XENA
She's busy.
BRUTUS
I'm glad you and Gabrielle are well.
What should I do with Antony?
XENA
The bath.
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If Brutus is right Xena, Antony may try to kill you.
I think he has some business to conclude with
me first.
Welcome Antony.
Oh this is my companion, Iris.
If I were your hands Iris, I would be fortunate indeed.
XENA
(to servants) Leave us.
ANTONY
No, I have matters to attend to. Besides, I have
supped full of pleasures this night. Perhaps by
morning, we can put this issue of trust behind us,
and move on.
Gods, I thought he was going to accept your
invitation. How did you know he wouldn't?
XENA
I didn't.
ACT TWO
Are you Cleopatra?
XENA
Are you my assassin?
OCTAVIUS
No! I was coming to see you.
XENA We have a front door for that.
OCTAVIUS
This was, but this was the only way. B--believe me.
Go!
Yah!
Help me!
Get up! Get up!
Cleopatra!
EXTRA
The queen's bedchamber!
Where'd you think you were going?
OCTAVIUS
Away from him. He wants me dead. Those assassins
were after me.
XENA
Oh, well aren't you the center of attention! Isn't it
more likely they were after me? It was my bedroom
they torched.
OCTAVIUS
That's why we must ally. They want us both dead.
XENA
And who are you?
ANTONY
Octavius. Queen Cleopatra, may I introduce the
grandnephew and adopted son, of Julius Caesar-
-and a traitor.
OCTAVIUS
I'm a traitor? What would Caesar think of his
closest friend denying me his throne?
ANTONY
Uncle Julius was too busy to realize, just how
ill-equipped you are. It's not that I love Caesar less.
I love Rome more.
Antony.
Cleopatra please, he'll kill me!
XENA
(whispers) Silence.
Take him away. I'll deal with him later.
Come on traitor!
XENA
(to Antony) How do I know that you aren't somehow
involved in this?
I came here, to put out the fire. We have unfinished
business, you and I.
Yes?
GABRIELLE
I'm losing sight of your plan Xena. Are you going
to flirt him to death?
XENA
I'm getting him to trust me so I can do what I
want with him.
GABRIELLE
Be careful. He's your type.
XENA
You think?
GABRIELLE
What's this "unfinished business"?
XENA
He's going to try to seduce me into letting him
use Cleopatra's navy.
GABRIELLE
And then?
XENA
And then I'll have him on his knees. Figuratively
speaking of course.
Of course.
Have I been blind?
SINGER #2 (voice-over)
Blind?
SINGER (voice-over)
Have I been lost?
SINGER #2 (voice-over)
Lost?
SINGER (voice-over)
Have I been wrong?
SINGER #2 (voice-over)
Have I been wrong?
SINGER (voice-over)
Have I been wise?
SINGER #2 (voice-over)
Have I been wise?
SINGER (voice-over)
Have I been strong?
Have I been hypnotized? Mesmerized?
SINGER (voice-over)
By what my eyes have found?
By what my eyes have found?
In that great street carnival?
SINGER #2 (voice-over)
Carnival, baby.
Have I been blind?
SINGER #2 (voice-over)
Blind?
SINGER (voice-over)
Have I been lost?
SINGER #2 (voice-over)
Lost? Have I been?
SINGER (voice-over)
Have I been wrong?
Have I been wrong?
SINGER (voice-over)
Have I been wise?
SINGER #2 (voice-over)
Have I been wise?
SINGER (voice-over)
Have I been strong?
Have I been hypnotized? Mesmerized?
SINGER (voice-over)
By what my eyes have found?
By what my eyes have found?
In that great street carnival?
In that carnival?
Queen Cleopatra.
Don't forget your meeting with your advisors.
XENA
Ah, my advisors. Yes they're such busybodies.
ANTONY
Rome wasn't built in a day.
What do you think you were doing? I was in complete control.
GABRIELLE
How far were you going to let that go?
XENA
Until he begged for my navel.
GABRIELLE
Your navy?
XENA
I know what I'm doing.
GABRIELLE
Xena what happens if he's the one who killed Cleopatra?
XENA
Then he's the one I'll kill if I have to. I have no
real feelings for him Gabrielle believe me.
This is from Antony.
Really?
SHIANA
He invites you to meet him tomorrow night, under
the pyramids.
XENA
Tell him I'll be there.
Got him right where I want him.
END OF ACT TWO
ACT THREE
Our time in this world is brief. Kingdoms, they're
mere clay. Will Rome surpass their majesty? I
don't know. In a place like this, a man is truly small.
XENA
Why did you come to Egypt?
My navy.
ANTONY
Yes...but that has changed.
XENA
Changed how?
ANTONY
I don't want you to give me your navy. You would
always suspect that is all I wanted from you.
XENA
So what do you want from me?
Your love.
XENA
My love won't help you in a fight against Brutus.
The first time I saw you, I knew a man would give
up a kingdom for such a woman. There is nothing
that I have learned since, that would change my mind.
Nothing?
ANTONY
Nothing.
Antony.
One of Brutus'?
No wait Antony. He could be useful to us.
Tell Brutus he missed. Tell him Antony and
Cleopatra are alive, well, and together.
Do you think I tried to kill Cleopatra?
GABRIELLE
I don't know.
Tears are for boys.
GABRIELLE
I know some men who could use a good cry.
OCTAVIUS
I need to put them behind me, and think of my people.
The people of Rome?
OCTAVIUS
And all who are under its protection. My uncle
exploited the peoples of the world for his ambition.
I want to correct that! To bring them Roman peace.
Pax Romana. Do you think I'm foolish?
GABRIELLE
No I don't.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Xena?
XENA
You were right Gabrielle. I do have a soft spot
for bad boys. Even worse is a bad boy who loves
like a fool.
GABRIELLE
What happened?
He wouldn't take Cleopatra's navy. He says he
wants my love instead. I think he means it.
GABRIELLE
Maybe you can enlist him as an ally.
XENA
Well what will happen when he finds out that I'm
not Cleopatra? That I've duped him all this time?
GABRIELLE
What are you going to do?
XENA
I can't let him get control of the empire. There's
plenty of blood on those hands of his. He's not
afraid to shed it. I know that. And what about Octavius?
GABRIELLE
He's idealistic. His heart's in the right place Xena.
XENA
I wonder if he and Antony can work together.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Making travel plans?
ANTONY
I'm trying to outguess Brutus.
XENA
And if you defeat him what will you do?
ANTONY
I will execute him, and all his men.
XENA
All of them? Even the common soldier?
ANTONY
There must be consequences for opposing
Marc Antony. Death, executions. It is the Roman
way...and I am Roman.
XENA
Yes I see.
And what about Octavius? I hear he's a good man.
ANTONY
He may be a good boy, but I cannot let him live
to be a good man.
Antony, take my navy. No I insist. This gesture of
yours is very sweet, but I get the point. I know that
you love me.
I've had reports that Brutus' fleet is approaching
the mouth of the Nile. Draw him into battle there.
At the appropriate time I will reinforce you. Brutus
will be crushed.
Rome...is eternally grateful.
Queen Cleopatra.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Approach Roman.
Boo.
BRUTUS
Xena.
XENA
That's right. I've been playing the part of Cleopatra,
because you killed her.
BRUTUS
You have to understand. Now I needed that navy.
And I knew I could never compete with Antony
for the affections of a beautiful woman. Now I
thought, if she were gone, I had a chance to
negotiate with her admirals.
GABRIELLE
That's your justification for murder?
BRUTUS
When I killed Caesar, I crossed the Rubicon of
blood. Why have you called me here?
XENA
It seems we have a common enemy. Marc Antony.
BRUTUS
You see what a dangerous man he is.
XENA
Oh yes I do. His fleet is moving toward the mouth
of the Nile. You meet him there and I'll reinforce.
Together we'll chop him into little pieces.
BRUTUS
Why should I trust you?
GABRIELLE
I'll go with you.
BRUTUS
I can't ask for a better guarantee than that. You
won't regret this.
I won't regret this.
GABRIELLE
The trap's been set. Perhaps you won't have to...
XENA
Kill Antony?
END OF ACT THREE
ACT FOUR
Perhaps when we have dealt with Brutus,-
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-a journey on the scented waters of the Nile...on
a golden barge with oars of silver, which we'll keep
stroked to the tune of flutes and make the waters
which they beat to follow faster, as though amorous
of each stroke.
XENA
Antony we're about to go into a major sea battle.
ANTONY
With Egypt's navy, we cannot lose.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Once we catch Antony-
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
-you'll give Xena the signal?
GABRIELLE
Yes.
BRUTUS
Then we'll see who will become Rome.
GABRIELLE
You've become an ambitious man Brutus.
BRUTUS
People change Gabrielle.
EXTRA
Higher! Higher!
BRUTUS
I remember when you spoke only of peace, and
now you're a warrior.
GABRIELLE
And you're a murderer.
BRUTUS
I killed Cleopatra for the good of Rome.
GABRIELLE
How many people have to die for the good of Rome?
Nervous?
SHIANA
Terrified. How about you?
OCTAVIUS
Definitely nervous.
EXTRA
I need a man up on the poop deck!
OCTAVIUS
Why are you here Shiana?
SHIANA
I promised my mistress I'd see her murderers
brought to justice.
EXTRA
Tie them off!
OCTAVIUS
I can't believe Cleopatra's gone. Death has no
respect for rank.
SHIANA
You're about to step onto the stage of history
Octavius. Are you ready?
OCTAVIUS
Yes. I feel I was born for this moment. I realize
now it's my destiny to rule Rome.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I stowed it down below.
ANTONY
(to Antony's Lieutenant) Never has a battle been
so one-sided.
Ship ahoy!
ANTONY
It's Brutus' flagship. We're gonna be rammed!
Light the signal!
There! Time to launch the Egyptian fleet on both
Antony, and Brutus. Prepare for battle!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Come on! Give me one!
EXTRA
Come on.
EXTRA
Here.
EXTRA
Pass it along.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
For the glory of Brutus!
EXTRA
For imperial Rome!
Free Rome from tyranny!
BRUTUS' LIEUTENANT
The Egyptians are attacking our fleet!
BRUTUS
What?!
You knew?
Xena-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a!
Cleopatra's navy is attacking both Roman fleets
from the rear!
ANTONY
Both Roman fleets?!
Xena.
You win my trust...my love...and then you betray everything.
Antony.
I did, love you.
Xena, Rome owes you a debt of gratitude.
XENA
Rome owes me nothing.
Octavius you'll soon be the new leader. It is you
who must recognize and support this new alliance
forged between Egypt and Rome. It cost Cleopatra
her life. Make sure it was worth it. (to all) Cleopatra
always put the well-being of her kingdom ahead
of her own. Respect this. She died in the hope that
the Egyptian people might for the first time, choose
their next great leader. She was Egypt.
STARRING
Lucy Lawless as Xena
Renee O'Connor as Gabrielle
GUEST CAST
Jon Bennett as Antony
David Franklin as Brutus
Mark Warren as Octavian
Josephine Davison as Cleopatra
Miriama Smith as Shiana
Paul Willis as Advisor #1
Geoffrey Knight as Antony's Lieutenant
Benjamin Crellin as Brutus' Lieutenant
Dion Blair as Soldier
Written by: Chris Manheim
Directed by: Mark Beesley
Disclaimer: No Rubberized Snakes intent on destroying the Queen of Egypt were harmed during the production of this motion picture.